Sunday, November 11, 2012

Seasons Change

As we head into mid November and the weather seems to be heading into early September I am reminded of the word that God has been speaking to my heart.  "Season."

Seasons are a beautiful thing, especially when you live somewhere like Buffalo, NY where there is tangible change as we enter into a new one.  My favorite season is autumn.  Hands down.  I love the colors, the warmth of the oranges, golds and rich browns.  I adore the smells of pumpkin, cinnamon and spice.  Mayer Brothers apple cider and Starbucks pumpkin scones could be my sustenance throughout the entire month of October.  I am not a huge fan of Halloween, but family gathered around the table at Thanksgiving with my Aunt Sue's turkey on the table makes my heart smile and makes me drool a little, too.

Summer is a close second with the sweet smell of freshly cut grass, a warm breeze blowing and the first warm day when you drive with all the windows down even when your car has air conditioning.  Life has many seasons but sometimes I fail to realize that.  I lose sight of that and think solely about the here and now feeling overwhelmed that nothing will ever change and whatever obstacle I'm facing will forever be there.

But life has seasons.  This is comforting to me- and I'm not a girl that particularly likes change.  But it reminds me that I don't have to have it all together.  It reminds me that I don't have to have it all figured out.  It reminds me that tension or that time to adjust to something new will end, because life has seasons and seasons change.

While with all my heart I knew I wanted to stay at home with my baby boy after he was born it wasn't necessarily an easy decision both from a financial stand point but also from a I've worked since I graduated college, this is who I am and this is what I do standpoint.  After quitting, while God made it very clear that was what He wanted me to do, and while I knew it was something I wanted as well, I struggled.  What was my purpose?  Days went by with my energy drained filled with thoughts of sitting behind a desk again with adults that could communicate with words that would affirm my abilities, who also wouldn't spit up on my clean outfit or need me to feed them every three hours.

I remember sitting at my MOPS table early on- Sully was only maybe a month and a half at this point and I hadn't yet quit my job.  I shared the struggle that was going on within me and one of the other moms told me she went through the same thing.  And then she realized it was a season.  Working full time was a season.  Staying home with a baby was a season.  And then having multiple kids and one in pre-school was a season.  Those words washed over me, refreshed me.  If working was a season, it would be ok for it to change.  If having a little one to care for that sucks all of my time, energy and attention is a season then it's ok that there is this adjustment period and there is hope to one day sleep a full 8 hours because someday a new season will come!

I don't know what your season looks like.  Mine is filled with a sweet, chubby cheeked little boy that has stolen my heart that needs to be fed every three hours and can now sleep longer than he did a month ago!  And when I get to the end of my day or my week and I have nothing left to give I remember that this is a season.  And because it's a season and one I won't be able to go back to with him I try to be intentional about pouring out all the love, hugs and kisses I can.  I try to be intentional about enjoying this season, hard as it is at moments.  Maybe the season you are in involves potty training, or sleepless nights or maybe it involves a really tough battle.  Maybe your season is filled with joy and excitement and times of blessing.  But I know that some of you may be in a season of loss, unknown, waiting or hardship.  Remember, it's a season.  And winter always seems longer than spring or summer (at least in Buffalo it does!) but it's a season.  There is hope.

Here's the hope I cling to- whatever the season God is good.  Always.  The seasons of our lives change.  But the God of the universe is unchanging.  He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8).  Whatever season you are in may you have the hope and peace that comes with knowing that God is good and that He's always in control.  He is crazy about you!